The age in our hands

At this time yesterday, I was still catching up on my homework under the lights. At that time there was nothing to what I could do besides completing the task. When I was in high school, I always felt like I was in a classroom, so I longed for the life of a university. Now I am to the university, can be considered a good university, but I think it is still not good, not feel in the squatting room, but like in the dispatch, dispatched to a place where no one asked. There is nothing to do, wandering all day, degenerate and dying, even the soul can not find. One of the most popular words in the Big Three is: depression! I carefully pondered for three days and nights, this word does have its connotation, the reason for almost everything can be explained by it. At this point I also really want to say: depressed! But I held back and didn’t say it. Look at the situation around me: the teacher on the podium is eloquent, and the lecturer off the podium is drowsy. This is a very serious disease, it seems to be more contagious than SARS, because I also infected, and not lightly ill. A sleep will be everlasting and immortal. I began to wonder if I am a pig. I asked my mom, my mom looked at me flabbergasted for half a day before saying, “You want to be a pig, why did not you tell me earlier?”

I always want to do something for myself, I can’t do the big things, except for the Internet to do “web development” or something, I will not do the same. This is what I suddenly thought of when I was surfing the Internet. When I got off the plane and swiped my credit card, I watched the money dwindle as fast as if the Columbia had crashed and fallen, and my heart was bleeding. “No more internet!” I finally knew what I had to do, and this was the only thing I was going to do. It’s better to keep the money for a relationship, and even if it doesn’t work out, at least there’s a sweet memory. Some people don’t believe me and say that I’m addicted to the Internet and that I can only quit if I go to rehab! Holy crap, they underestimate me too. But I can’t bear to be silent and hidden, I still want to leave myself a little something worth remembering. So I built two groups, one is my high school class built, and the other is for my gang even dead to stick together buddies built, even though there are not a few, this is my only contribution before the decision – look at yourself, I think it’s great, just like the river warriors to retreat from the general. I do not want to know how long these two groups can support, can support a moment is a moment, I also care about it later? Now I can finally look up to the sky long laugh – ha ha –
I’m not sure why it’s popular in the big three to say that the beauty of the management, the handsome civil engineering, electrical hooligans. This is the biggest disrespect to us! I still have a vivid memory is in the bleachers of the sports field, a girl openly said to me: “Look at you sharp-tongued, swarthy, at a glance is …… is the electrical ……” still count her have The mouth virtue, did not say I am a hooligan. Perhaps as someone said: big difficulties to achieve big business. The experience is also a kind of humiliating big difficulties, especially for a man of good moral character like me! And the achievement? No other, I feel that my cheek has thickened a lot. Seeing a beautiful woman will go up to talk, see a handsome man will avoid cursing. I feel very pleased, like the feeling after winning a battle. Thankfully: I do not have a girlfriend, otherwise I really do not know how to coax her to believe that I am not a hooligan. I have observed that there is no one lady in the big three, all as fierce tigers down the mountain, I do not even dare to shoot the horse’s ass, for fear of accidentally being eaten by the tiger. In addition there are three major benefits of not having a girlfriend: not to be a punching bag, not to be a porter, not to worry about money. Who cares if I am a student or a hooligan, even I dare to say in front of girls: “I am a hooligan who I am afraid of!” It is as if this is a sense of accomplishment for college students. I am such a person.

I think we live a pretty empty life. There is nothing to do all day, except for talking about beautiful women in the dormitory, talking about good food in the classroom, talking about “money” in the toilet, talking about games in the Internet cafe, I really can’t find anything good to do. There is a saying: do not use a radical vision to see the problem, but to use a constructive vision to see the problem, I think the actual, for us, only possible to use a constructive vision to see, if a little bit of radical words, I dare say, we will die without a body! Who asked us to be so wild? In fact, we are also very cute. Just no girls to love the reason. If one day there is a chance that I will meet a girl than a lady, that is the blessing I made in my previous life. Just now I look through the sky of love only occasionally to find a small plane. Can you blame me for this? So I say we’re really fucking pathetic again. If it’s really okay, a few of my buddies hold a beer bottle, in the vast Yangtze River chanting “the dead are like the husband” and so on, even the literature students also vomit we do not understand the poem. And then a sense of accomplishment like throwing the beer bottle into the river, very heroic, heroic forget to spill the bottle also pressed the pressure of gold it, and then even more heroic – to the sky long laugh, attracting a turnaround rate of 100%, passers-by certainly think we are crazy …… only we know: we not crazy. We are still awake and alive, living a very sunny life.

Yesterday I came back very late, there was no one on the road, walking alone, then the state of mind is very quiet, quiet like a lake. But I felt as if half a century had passed, and I woke up in a dream that everything was already very far away – on the other side of the sky! Is it familiar or strange, I can’t tell myself. The neon lights in the supermarket were still flashing, but there were fewer people; the street lights were still on, but there were fewer people; people who were in a hurry were probably waiting for a beautiful dream to come. It was at this time that I discovered that everything finally has a quiet time, even if it is very short, but at least there is less noise. What have I ever said, done, loved, hated, promised, given 。。。。。。 I don’t know, I really don’t know. The days just went by, silently going by my side, and I knew nothing. I’m a bit chagrined by my actions, but there isn’t much to blame myself for, I’m still excusing myself for something, just one more reason.

I never look at myself in the mirror, but I did this morning.

I was surprised by myself:my hair is quite white. One two three …… roots can be counted. Maybe I’m really old maybe youth really doesn’t belong to us anymore maybe laughter is just yesterday maybe I’ll regret it ……

Time has taken away everything, and the only thing I can’t take away is myself …….

O the times in our hands!